Category Archives: Vulnerability

Old Ghost

Sometimes you sit in a sermon and it makes life appear so easy, just turn your face to Jesus. And it really is that easy almost.

This weekend marks 6 years of going to church and in those 6 years Leisha and I have pushed so hard for personal transformation as individuals, as a couple, as a family. We have experienced so much, I know a little bit about that life style now, metanoia. I just don’t think you get to where you need to be without facing your Old Ghost. In fact Leisha is in the throws of discovering and facing some Old Ghost who have hidden themselves so well she only has an inkling they are really there…  Sometimes it’s so painful for her and you have to know surely painful for me to watch from a near, from a far.  I am trying to be as good to her through this as she has been to me, its difficult, she set the bar high.

I am convinced it takes both facings, Jesus and Old Ghost, one lifts up, takes you to a place you should be, the other takes you down to a place you need to go.  If you don’t go there you probably won’t be able to hear or see where Jesus was and especially what he wants to talk about … about those Old Ghost.

Old Ghost
Haunt these halls and cross my lonely thoughts
Show up in the funny way I talk
Speak to me in records that I bought
Screamin at me for all the things I lost

Old Ghost
Lingerin by my old stompin grounds
They built them all and tore the old house down
I can’t go back and I can’t go around
The devils that live on that side of town

I believe in things that I can’t see
In my blood and in my bones
These old Ghost they all belong to me
They hurt me and they heal me
They hide and they reveal me
Remind me what I will be when I’m gone

Old Ghost
Sometimes in the Dark they hold me close
Whisper things I wish I didn’t know
About my self and every heart I’ve

I believe in things I can’t see
In my blood and in my bones
These old Ghost they all belong to me
They hurt me and they heal me
They hide and they reveal me
Remind me what I will be when I’m gone

Some thoughts on the journey into Vunerability

Vulnerability is such a hard topic to get right. A lot is written about it and just because you read those things doesn’t mean you will get it right for you… I know that from experience.

Leisha and I have been on a 10 month purposeful discussion, journey, adventure into the depths of what that means for us to be vulnerable to each other. I could say a lot by now… but then the first sentence above would probably apply to you…here are some guide post “I think”, not sure just yet…

1) it is only when you are vulnerable do people really see the real you. An un-vulnerable person has all sorts of walls and props put up to hide behind, hold themselves up and be something other than that real person. There is usually a lot of pride tied into that state of being.

2) If you are in love with the un-vulnerable person then you are are not really in love with the real person.

3). If you are not settled enough in your own skin and thus not being vulnerable, you might be difficult to be truly in loved…. (see 1)

4). It just might be that the only real way to be a healthy vulnerable you is in a transforming relationship with Jesus Christ. It just might be all other you’s are a facade.

Free people Free people
Hurting People Hurt People

It is due to some massive breakthroughs on this one point this last weekend I made this and posted it…. Months and months of discussion, practice, some anger, ohhhh lots and lots and lots of prayer and some frustration then finally….breakthrough. Its no small journey.

My Love